Disappointment again. 103 lbs. I wanna die, I really do. I will fight and come back stronger...bye bye.....

Left myself a little...

First I have to say that I felt a little jealous of one person I'm fan of and desided to add to new pictures too. So here they are:



And then I must admit that I left myself a little this week since I worked a lot, ate too much and didn't do much exersise. Of course my temporary job has lots and lots of walking and going up and down a stair so at least I can say I wasn't seating all the time.My weight still remains at 97 pounds and that's all. I hope you guys do great at your effort, many many kisses...

Amelia.

I'M DISGUSTED!!

Hello beautiful tiny ladies! I think the scale can't move lower whatever I do. It stuck at 97, fuck!! I don't either feel like writing here, I'm tired of feeling frustrated and fat. And finally one day I will answer to all these girls who keep telling me "OMG you're so tiny,OMG you're so thin,eat something", NO, I'm not tiny and skinny YOU ARE SO FAT, THAT'S IT!!Eating all the time,and then complaining you can't lose weight, it's so gross.And you make me tell lies and pretend that I eat normally and everything and "I just exersize that's all". Damn...

Kill the food lover!!!

Today I felt I ate like hell!! I consumed 900 cals and managed to burn only the 500 of them. Well I had crunches too, but I don't know how many cals I burnt. Fuck, fuck, fuck!!!! I'm so horrible, why can't I help myself? Why can't I stop dreaming eating? It's too hard but I cannot stop, no way. I saw one of my friends yesterday, I haven't seen her for a long time. OMG, she was soooooooooooooooo skinny, sooooooooooooo skinny. I couldn't take my eyes of her. How did she do that? why I can't????
And another thing:My scale is broken so I'm completeley helpless :-(

I took these photos this morning. I don't have any readers so no one can tell his opinion. At least I will have them here to see my progress...

Good evening people! It's 00:45, I'm typing some words and then fall asleep. Yesterday a funny thing happened. I met one of my brother's friend and he looked me horrified. "OMG, how are you like this?"he said,"why did you lose so much weight? You're really ugly like this you know that?"I told him I'm just tired, and I just got back from work and that is why I look like this, but he continued to stare at me like I was an alien.


The point is I was really happy! Iwas happy he told me I look so thin, I didn't even care about the "ugly". Is this ok? I don't know, and I don't care.Better ugly than fat for me.I also have to step on scale tommorrow. There might be a little possibility that I've lost a pound or something. Ok, time to bed.

Nighty nighty...

ana consumes me I consume nothing ep 3

Hello everyone.Today was a very quiet day. I decided to write down my new measurements since the've changed a bit. Basically my hips are now 34,64inches, and my thighs are 20,66. So there...Till now I've consumed 490 calories,later I'll exersize too. And sometimes I start to feel a little ok and then something happens and it starts all over again and I feel I don't try enough. I saw this girl on you tube wich explains how difficult and dangerous anorexia is and all I kept thinking was "OMG she is so beautiful and thin, how am I like this??!!"

It would be really nice if I had someone to understand me, someone to talk about it,someone to help me control myself and stay strong

Bye for now...